I was recently inspired to do a video update, and thought it a wonderful idea since it would likely be much quicker than me writing a whole bunch and you reading a whole bunch. So I hope you enjoy the quick video to catch you up on where I am at now.
I know I said I'd put up some pictures of the beach, but I ended up not taking any pictures of the beach that day, sorry. Anyway, I look forward to doing more video updates in the future, as they are kind of exhilarating and fun.
Monday, September 21, 2009
Monday, September 7, 2009
My new book journey
So I've had this book sitting on my bookshelf a couple of months and have wanted to read it since I got it. The rain was falling yesterday afternoon as I was preparing to take Emily to the airport and the gloominess gave me this strong desire to curl up and read a book. I was standing next to my bookshelf and this one book just kept pulling at me, but I walked downstairs to get ready to go. Almost ready to go, my mind returned to the thought that after I dropped her off I could just go somewhere and read for a little bit before returning to life. I thought of the book and couldn't resist running upstairs one more time to get the book, on the off chance that I decided to stop and read
Flash forward a little: I can't find a good place aside from home to read, so I just decide to go home and park it on the living room couches - the most comfy couches in the whole house, and some of the most comfy in which I've ever sat. The living room was not as quiet as I wanted but I trusted that if I were focused enough the TV would not bother me. On the way home the desire to journal had been growing. So I sat down and wrote a little to Jesus, using this book as a sort of writing surface. In the middle of a train of thought I played with the bead on the bookmark I had earlier placed in the book for use once I had read some. All of a sudden my current thoughts were interrupted by an idea. Whether it is from God or not, and whether that even matters, I don't know. I do know that the more I read about this book and what others say about it, I get more and more excited to journey through it. But I know it has the potential to be a hard journey for me and I would love for someone to go with me. My thought was, "I could read this through with someone else," and I got excited at that thought. Then as I read through some of the preliminary stuff, that idea of reading through it with someone else was confirmed. Brian McLaren says of this book, "[it] is a treasure to be read slowly and with your closest friends." The book is titled To Be Told by Dan Allender. My counselor gave it to me at the end of our time together and I'm really excited to read more about some of the principles she said she got from this book. I'll probably take it slowly as I usually need time to process these things (and I'm busy and I don't have a lot of time to read more books - I struggle just to read the ones for class. But this is important enough for me to make time for it in my schedule). I'm hoping it will change my life as I journey through it.
Flash forward a little: I can't find a good place aside from home to read, so I just decide to go home and park it on the living room couches - the most comfy couches in the whole house, and some of the most comfy in which I've ever sat. The living room was not as quiet as I wanted but I trusted that if I were focused enough the TV would not bother me. On the way home the desire to journal had been growing. So I sat down and wrote a little to Jesus, using this book as a sort of writing surface. In the middle of a train of thought I played with the bead on the bookmark I had earlier placed in the book for use once I had read some. All of a sudden my current thoughts were interrupted by an idea. Whether it is from God or not, and whether that even matters, I don't know. I do know that the more I read about this book and what others say about it, I get more and more excited to journey through it. But I know it has the potential to be a hard journey for me and I would love for someone to go with me. My thought was, "I could read this through with someone else," and I got excited at that thought. Then as I read through some of the preliminary stuff, that idea of reading through it with someone else was confirmed. Brian McLaren says of this book, "[it] is a treasure to be read slowly and with your closest friends." The book is titled To Be Told by Dan Allender. My counselor gave it to me at the end of our time together and I'm really excited to read more about some of the principles she said she got from this book. I'll probably take it slowly as I usually need time to process these things (and I'm busy and I don't have a lot of time to read more books - I struggle just to read the ones for class. But this is important enough for me to make time for it in my schedule). I'm hoping it will change my life as I journey through it.
Friday, August 21, 2009
"Perfect Worship"
Here is a poem I wrote for English class in 12th grade. It's called "Perfect Worship."
Rain or shine you reach for the sky,
growing closer every day.
Your branches spread wide
touching every life with hospitality.
Deep are your roots
in the soil of truth,
drawing nourishment
from the Bread of Life.
Pruned with love,
watered with care,
even more faithful
each passing year.
Oh, how I wish
I could be like thee!
Tuesday, May 12, 2009
Miscellaneous and application update
Well, that is my first flat tire. It took a flat tire for God to get me to stop and rest a little. Usually it's not that bad, but sometimes he does need to do something drastic like that.
Previously I mentioned that I have a summer job. Well, what I think I have failed to make clear to most people is that I will be moving for the summer in order to work at that job. So tomorrow I pack, move an hour and a half away, and unpack. I hope I can get it all done in one day; and that I don't forget anything too important and have to make another trip.
I went to Islands of Adventure today with the students from my internship. It was lots of fun!
Ok, so now for the more lengthy and more important stuff - the application update. Yesterday I met with a woman on staff to discuss further some things I had written in my application. When I was filling out my application I was very honest (as I thought I should be even though it was unnerving). Some of the things that I mentioned came as red flags to the staff that was processing my application; which I completely understand. So this woman heard of this and wanted to talk face-to-face and get a better feeling of how I am doing with this stuff. It was a good conversation. But I am left more unsure than I was before. I am less confident that this is God's plan, but I don't have any other desires that come close to this one, and I don't know what else I would do if I don't get this job, so.....I still think I'll get it, I'm just not so sure. I completely understand their concerns, and identify/agree with one in particular - one very important one that I had not thought of before. I left with the feeling that I have a 50-50 chance of acceptance. (One thing I really appreciated was the woman's honesty with me, and thus, the reasons I know these things and more.) I don't know what is best and I'm not going to make that decision; I'm going to let someone else make that decision and pray that if this is not God's best for me that he would close the door on this opportunity. Sorry so vague, I just don't have much time to explain more, plus I don't know how much I would want to share, so yeah.... I hope to hear back from them by the end of this week or the middle of next week at the latest. Please pray that God would give these people his supernatural wisdom to know what decision to make. Thanks.
Wednesday, April 29, 2009
: )
it eating some dinner. Amazing.
Endings and beginnings
Last Friday marked the last day of my internship and May 9th will mark the end of my college career (at least for now). During my internship I actually ended up with the same teacher with whom I was during my first internship. As any internship is, it was a challenging and growing experience. But my favorite part was getting to know the students better. One thing I realized recently is that I would not make a good public school teacher, at least not now. I am too inclined to be a friend and spiritual mentor. Though I never discussed this with my supervising teacher, her final evaluation reflected this conclusion. Along with that realization comes the one that I may never teach. One of my dreams is to return to school and earn a masters degree and a certificate, which would probably lead to a different career. So the fact that I broke all the rules with this internship and that I might never use the professional experience can only lead to one conclusion - God did it. I don't doubt that he wanted me there for a reason. But what is that reason? My guess is what I liked the most - getting to know the students - and what I now hope to do. The end of my internship brought some sadness, but mostly excitement that I can begin a different kind of relationship with the youth that I met and befriended. I can finally be a friend and mentor, crossing boundaries a public school teacher cannot or should not cross. So though my internship is over, a new beginning is taking place - new relations.
Along with the end of my college career comes the dawn of a new career. I have applied to go on staff with Student Venture - the high school and middle school ministry of Campus Crusade for Christ. It seems to match my current desires perfectly and I am really excited that I can actually get paid to do what I love. I will keep you posted as to how the application process is going. As of right now, I am waiting for a "We are processing your application" phone call. Even though this is something about which I am really excited, those thoughts of doubt have been creeping in. I cannot really say that this is what I want to do for the rest of my life, because God has scared me with other dreams (the big ones, I have previously mentioned). Realizing that I will probably leave this career makes me doubt whether I should be in it at all, but at the present moment I cannot imagine myself doing anything else. I imagine myself in this career for a number of years, even to the point of, with it, fulfilling a dream God inspired. So there is much work to be done in Student Venture, but I foresee an end to that work and thus a beginning to something else. But that is many years down the road.
So for the time in between, there are mundane and exciting things. These few weeks until I begin my summer job I am just bummin' around trying to get my room and life back to organized before the time goes away again. I will also be attending many exciting events to include my own graduation! as well as a field trip, last day of school, wedding shower, bachlorette party, and two weddings - in the same day. So exciting stuff for the weeks to come. Along with that, hopefully I can casually hang out with friends, Jesus, and get some rest. Then starts my summer job. : ) I have the privilege of being part of a full-time youth ministry team for my home church - we call it Summer Staff. I am so excited for this endeavor and the possibilities of what God can do. He has already been giving me vision and ideas for the summer, which just excites me to the upmost.
*sigh* Much behind me, much ahead. Enjoy the pictures!
It's funny and scary how much I really look like a PE teacher in these photos.
Not the best picture, but one of my best classes. : )
Probably my smallest class, but some of my favorite people.
Bigger class = more challenging. But so rewarding when you actually make a difference.
Eating lunch with the students on my last day. It is definitely an experience.
It was so precious - one of my students as she was leaving the locker room that day asked me if I would eat lunch with them...how could I resist!
I volunteered as the assistant coach for the girls' basketball team. This is our cake for our banquet.
The team manager and me. We spent many practices talking and goofing off - it was a lot of fun! She is such a cutie and is just an amazing person.
All my lady huskies!
Along with the end of my college career comes the dawn of a new career. I have applied to go on staff with Student Venture - the high school and middle school ministry of Campus Crusade for Christ. It seems to match my current desires perfectly and I am really excited that I can actually get paid to do what I love. I will keep you posted as to how the application process is going. As of right now, I am waiting for a "We are processing your application" phone call. Even though this is something about which I am really excited, those thoughts of doubt have been creeping in. I cannot really say that this is what I want to do for the rest of my life, because God has scared me with other dreams (the big ones, I have previously mentioned). Realizing that I will probably leave this career makes me doubt whether I should be in it at all, but at the present moment I cannot imagine myself doing anything else. I imagine myself in this career for a number of years, even to the point of, with it, fulfilling a dream God inspired. So there is much work to be done in Student Venture, but I foresee an end to that work and thus a beginning to something else. But that is many years down the road.
So for the time in between, there are mundane and exciting things. These few weeks until I begin my summer job I am just bummin' around trying to get my room and life back to organized before the time goes away again. I will also be attending many exciting events to include my own graduation! as well as a field trip, last day of school, wedding shower, bachlorette party, and two weddings - in the same day. So exciting stuff for the weeks to come. Along with that, hopefully I can casually hang out with friends, Jesus, and get some rest. Then starts my summer job. : ) I have the privilege of being part of a full-time youth ministry team for my home church - we call it Summer Staff. I am so excited for this endeavor and the possibilities of what God can do. He has already been giving me vision and ideas for the summer, which just excites me to the upmost.
*sigh* Much behind me, much ahead. Enjoy the pictures!
It's funny and scary how much I really look like a PE teacher in these photos.
Not the best picture, but one of my best classes. : )
Probably my smallest class, but some of my favorite people.
Bigger class = more challenging. But so rewarding when you actually make a difference.
Eating lunch with the students on my last day. It is definitely an experience.
It was so precious - one of my students as she was leaving the locker room that day asked me if I would eat lunch with them...how could I resist!
I volunteered as the assistant coach for the girls' basketball team. This is our cake for our banquet.
The team manager and me. We spent many practices talking and goofing off - it was a lot of fun! She is such a cutie and is just an amazing person.
All my lady huskies!
Sunday, January 11, 2009
Internship tomorrow!
Well, tomorrow starts my senior internship. I am so excited to be at the same school at which I was last semester. It is a wonderful school and I love the students I got to know last semester. I also love that it is close enough that I can ride my bike there. I don't know yet if I will be with the same teacher, though that would be awesome because I really like her students. It is crazy to believe I will be graduating in May. *sigh* What a journey this has been...and yet there is so much more to come.
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