As many of you know, I used to speak so freely and often about my faith and what God does in my life. Now, years later I've been trying to figure out why that changed so significantly, such that I hardly say anything anymore - it really saddened me, as I felt like I had lost a part of me...a big part. As I have pondered and searched my heart and mind, I discovered that while teaching and coaching in the public school system, I felt stifled and suffocated. And even though it has been over a year since leaving public education, I am only recently starting to reconnect with that part of me. I'm so grateful for some of my friends and team members, especially Jodi and Diane, who speak so freely and frequently about their faith, and of their love and praise for God. It has inspired me to find my words again, and my freedom to let my full authentic self show up wherever I go, through not shrinking back from sharing what fills me with joy, hope and a rich faith.
I want to get around to sharing about tonight's dinner, but I kind of have to play catch up first, to give some much needed context.
For as long as I can remember, I have always felt a sense of awe and wonder about the Jewish people, because the Bible calls them "God's chosen people". I have always wanted to learn more and be close to them, and I still cannot explain why. After college I had a friend who is Jewish and a believer in Jesus (Yeshua). For that time period we hung out, I asked questions and we visited a couple Messianic congregations, and a synagogue. It whet my appetite. Our lives kept moving on and we lost touch. I still wanted to learn more, but the Jewish world felt so different and I knew I needed someone who could take me along and show me the way.
Flash forward several years to the time I joined eHarmony. I finally was being very intentional to not just pray for a significant other, but to also put myself out there. Eventually I came across this picture of a patriotic cutie with a bright smile. As I read his profile I saw some Hebrew words and was intrigued...and attracted! I had come to value the original languages of the Bible, and loved when people would use and teach them. So here was this guy using some Hebrew and I sent him a smile. Once he finally responded (haha, I poke fun that it took him three whole days!), he initiated a little chit chat and then he asked about my spiritual journey (more brownie points that he asked before me, as compared to previous guys I had talked with where I had to ask first). In the midst of that conversation, I learned that he and some of his family had been following Messianic Judaism since he was 12 years old - quite some time indeed! As we continued to grow our relationship, I was hungry to learn and he was excited to share - it really was a match made by God. He had been praying for someone who would simply be open to learning, and here I was, ready to hit the ground running! And I had not been praying at all! It had not even occurred to me to ask God for a man who could lead and teach me in that...I think maybe I didn't think there was such a man out there. ...I am still amazed at the pair of us that God brought together - more than what either of us had dared to ask God, but exactly what each of us had been deeply desiring. So amazing - He is so good to us!
Since then I have learned so much, and enjoy such a richness and depth to my understanding of and faith in the Messiah. No, none of us are Jewish, but onlookers would probably say the way we live out our faith looks Jewish...and I love that, because that is how Yeshua (Jesus) lived and I feel so much closer to Him, I feel more intimately connected with Him through knowing and doing the things He knew and did. I know there are many different theologies and viewpoints out there, which I do not intend to discuss in this blog post, but what I will say is this - I have had several people already tell me that "we don't have to do that stuff anymore," and I understand that point of view. For me, it is not about "have to", I am free to, and I get so much life and joy out of it! It brings me closer to the Messiah, my Savior, so why wouldn't I!? Every cycle of the Biblical/Hebrew calendar takes me deeper and deeper into intimacy with Him. The more I learn from Jewish scholars, even non-Messianic ones, the more I learn about Messiah! Luke, one of Yeshua's talmidim (one of Jesus' disciples) wrote, "Then beginning with Moses and all the Prophets, He [Yeshua] explained to them the things written about Himself in all the Scriptures." (Luke 24:27) All Scripture points to Him, so even if I am learning from Jewish sources, I am still learning about the Messiah. So you see, my Jewish-looking faith, is how I have grown closer to Messiah, not farther.
Now that you have the backstory and context, I want to get back to our special dinner. Tonight begins a new month in the Hebrew calendar, which in Hebrew is called "rosh chodesh". Traditionally, the theme of rosh chodesh is renewal, or newness. Each new moon, TJ and I eat a special meal to remind us of what the Israelites did. In 1 Samuel 20, we read part of the story of David and Jonathan. What I always used to miss, but now I see is that the time frame for this story revolves around rosh chodesh - the new moon, and how they had a special meal to celebrate and observe. It is also mentioned in Numbers 10:10, and other places, as a time of celebration and praise to God, often accompanied by feasting.
As TJ and I have woven this observance into our life, I always am amazed at how often it coincides with "new" things. I think I need to start writing them down, because there have been so many, such as moving, starting a new job, etc. So what is it this time? Tomorrow, the first day of the new month, I leave for a trip to meet my new life coach, and to meet (in person) some of my new team for a business retreat. It feels like a new beginning - new life, and renewal of things already in motion. As I said, it is amazing how so many new or renewed things begin at the time of a new moon, when God's people, for centuries, have already been acknowledging renewal.
